once my sister marie gave me just the book i needed. i found it the other day, and it was just the book i needed again. only i know where some mountains are, and they've always been there, and i still haven't climbed them. cheers to another day, one with more guts!
here is something i find ironic. i hate change in the world outside me* but i love love love change inside me. i think this has something to do with change in the world feeling like loss and change within me feeling like triumph. even when the change in the world brings goodness--my niece and nephews growing up, for example--it feels like something goes that doesn't come back again. there are few parts of me that i guess i wouldn't like to lose, but pretty much everything else is negotiable. i want to be someone that i'm not yet. doesn't everybody want to be someone, to be someone?
*the only exception is seasons because they go round and round and round.
5 comments:
oh but the seasons always feel like loss to me. i need to work on that one. more than anything else i wish the earth would stop spinning.
me myself i've got nothing to prove. and i think i need to go buy that book today:)
Loss and triumph: EXACTLY the way to describe those two different kinds of changes. I wish I'd figured out how to say this a long time ago. Thanks.
mm well put my dear. to be someone. love you
i don't think i ever told you how much i love this book. I secretly looked for it a few times under your bed only to find that you had taken it home to slc. i definitely need to get my own copy.
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